Random moment in which the readers are invited to eavesdrop on the author as she addresses her characters...
All right, let's settle down. Everybody find a seat, please. Weapons may be left with Ignacio, the swarthy fellow by the door with the big box. There will be no eating or drinking during the address, and I want all eyes on me. Villains are to be seated in a separate box, so as not to interfere as they are wont to do.
Now that we're all comfortable, I have a few matters that need addressing. Number one, I am finishing the first draft of Jonnet and Simon's book this week, so I will not be available to the rest of you until after the conference. After that, numbers will be assigned and schedules planned so everyone gets a fair shot. The administration here has a plan for the year's work that should work out well for all of us, though it will mean some changes.
First of all, there will be at least two books this year rather than one. I know this will mean longer days and perhaps more stomping about, but it does also mean I can deal with you all in a far more timely fashion. Once numbers have been assigned (Ignacio will be right to that as soon as he has everything in the box tagged so it can be returned to the rightful owners when we are done) you are to form a queue to the right, and I will be with you in order.
How is this order to be determined, you may ask? I know there have been rumors of marketability, and I will say up front that it is one of the factors. I know most of you have your affairs taken care of with estates and inheritances, commissions, salaries or prizes, but those of us on the other side of the keyboard depend on you for our livelihoods and we do not recieve our portion until you have achieved your happily ever afters.
The order will not neccessarily be chronological, and before I hear any grumbling on that front, please hear me out. Some of you ::cough cough:: have been more reticent in talking to me than others. Some may be keeping mum about their pasts, their hopes for the future, or their familial relations. You in the back, stop snickering. Some may be shy about their own shortcomings or have not yet allowed me to tour their domiciles. This only puts these characters' stories off until later.
Let's addres the research issue -- if I need to know it, I will find out. There. It doesn't matter if I do not at present know what sort of architechture was prevalent during your period -- I'm warning you, in the back. One more time, and you get demoted to sidekick.-- I will find out. If I do not know the name of the Dutch monarch in power, I will look it up. Ditto trade routes, what countries are fighting or friendly with what other countries and so on.
We will take a short recess and then reconvene for the rest of our program. If you have any questions, Ignacio will be glad to record them and convey them to me via the comment section.